It's been 24 hours and David Bowie is still dead.

Fuck that.

Major Tom to Ground Control - "The moon isn't actually that far away."

Originally published at benchiladaland. You can comment here or there.

It’s only been 8 months, so I guess it’s not that bad. 😐

Still going over on FB, and I’ve been stuck-as-fuck on my art, but how about this thing I made while in a bout of insomnia. I had some whiskey to keep me company.

These are all true…probably.

As always, click to embiggen for the I DRAW TOO SMALL bits.

Facts art - last page benchilada

Love,

benjamin

Originally published at benchiladaland. You can comment here or there.

Between protesting Governor Rauner’s “right to work” bullshit–he’s at the I-Hotel today, so a hoard of people are going over to shout at him–and protesting Tasers, and going to City Council meetings–congrats, Aaron!–and volunteering at the Champaign County Humane Society, and helping more at home as Nadja makes Carnivale Debauche costumes and…look, we been busy.

I have no larger project right now, so have some more dick jokes.

Cock RobinShuttlecock

Love,
benjamin

Originally published at benchiladaland. You can comment here or there.

 
 
I’ve been busy, but I drew you something anyway.

Crotch Rocket
If you’re “lucky,” there’ll be more on Thursday!

b

Originally published at benchiladaland. You can comment here or there.

 

Craigslist has come through for us before, and it has come through for us again.

I had this AIWA turntable to get rid of, since I need one with a USB jack:

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA
Nadja and I are big fans of the barter system, and a gentleman offered two pieces of art:

16152385207_6396b84af9_k
They are, from left to right “Clever Worms Hiding in the Grass” and “Use Wisely But With Coconut.”

We thought that wasn’t a balanced deal, so Nadja threw in some of her pear ginger jam, which is fucking obscenely delicious.The fellow’s name is Shane Rodems; I love his stuff, and recommend his works very highly. They’re even cheap! Go buy something!

Nadja and I ride the bus a lot, even now that we have a car. After all, the CUMTD got us to the show on time, and their app garage means that you can pick from many programs to keep track of your bus via live GPS.

Now that The Wizard’s Lesson is completely finished, it’s time to move on to some one-shots before trying another large project.

We see plenty of different jackasses while riding, so I figure I’ll do a few
comics about the matters. Please to enjoy:

Bus-Holes Douchebagging
There will be more appearances from bus-holes, I promise. Twenty years of riding really builds up your knowledge of jackasses.

That’s it for now.Don’t forget that this comic leaves copyright on January 22, 2015.

 

Love,
benjamin

Originally published at benchiladaland. You can comment here or there.

Sometimes I worry that I’ve been listening to too much Goon Show [autoplay warning] and general British radio comedy. Then I remember what the Tick had to say about moderation:

“Always remember: less is less, more is more. More is better, and twice as much is good too. Not enough is bad, and too much is never enough except when it’s just about right.”

After I finish this folk tale comic, expect more one-shots and proper blog posts, some of which may not even have art! GASP! I’ve got a new camera–an Olympus XZ-2 that Nadja found for about 60% off–so I’ll be doing photos again as well.

Anyroad, here’s a nice splash page to click on and make huge and be all WHOA YOU FUCKED UP TZU CH’UN and next week? The whole thing rolls up and finishes, and then…the lesson?

Wizard's Lesson Fucked Up for blog

Well. Glad he sorted THAT out for us.

Love,

benjamin

Originally published at benchiladaland. You can comment here or there.

 

Let’s just chat for a second before we get into today’s comic, the heaviest one in the whole thing. After this we only have a few more days of postings left.

Anyroad, there’s a chance that BIG HERO 6 is still playing in a theater near you.

Go goddamned see it.


Seriously, the movie is ridiculously good, and the trailer doesn’t in any way express its complexities.

If you don’t like it, I’ll…dunno, maybe I’ll do something for you. And then I’ll tick the box next to your name that says “COLD AND EMOTIONLESS.”

In related news, my latest bad movie watching was Gor. Oddly, I could only find a Spanish-language trailer for it.

If you’re not familiar with the world of Gor…well, it’s not entirely pleasant. I’d say more on it, but I’ve refused to ever read any book in the series.

The movie managed to be both offensive and inoffensive. It’s was mostly a standard 80’s sword-and-sorcery film, but with a lot more women tied up and treated like objects than one would expect. And hair. My god, Gor invented hairspray but not hairstyling.

RIGHT! On to the most troubling bit of The Wizard’s Lesson. After this, it’s only a tiny bit more to wrap things up, then on to our discussion about the lesson.

As always, click the pic to embiggen.

First, the last installment I posted:

Wizard's Lesson birth
And now…

Wizard's Lesson brains dashed out
Wizard's Lesson he is back
So that happened.

Love,

benjamin

Originally published at benchiladaland. You can comment here or there.

A chill page this week, but perhaps a bit ominous. I think it will take about three more postings to finish this bad boy off.

On the last day, I’ll give you a huge post with everything to date.

For now, please to enjoy wedded bliss:

Wizard's Lesson birth smaller

Love,

benjamin

Originally published at benchiladaland. You can comment here or there.

 
 
It doesn’t matter much, though, since my ability to draw pretty ladies extends about as far as I can flick a boulder. I make do with “visual cues.” *koff*

Need a RECAP?
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Take Him To The Pit!
Eight Hells
Reincarnation

As always, click the pic to embiggen.

Wizards Lesson Pretty Lady
I’ve also included my latest Artisan Pony, which is one of my more unfortunate ones. I intentionally started drawing from the back of the neck, which led to some, whatchamacallits…birth defects. Submissions always welcome, click the pony for details.
Artisan Pony backwards unfortunate head

The Wizard’s Lesson has rounded the last curve and is entering the final straightaway, to use pony terminology. I figure that by the end of the next two weeks, it will be finished. I’ll make a post with the entirety of the work as the last entry for it.

Anybody have suggestions/requests on what to draw next, beyond my “Grammar Nazis” comic and “the benchilada tarot?”

Love,

benjamin

Originally published at benchiladaland. You can comment here or there.

S’up, kids?

I’m tired of waiting until the last minute to do the actual writy-bit of my entries, so I’m actually writing this the night before.

I haven’t been sticking to my Ten Minutes A Day rule with my art, justifying the many hours I spend on them anyway as being justified. This is bullshit, amirite*?

Don’t get me wrong, I’m having fun with the Artisan Pony Project and the fabulous guest artists that I’ve gotten so far, but I feel like I’ve been dropping-out of the one-page-funny comics, focusing perhaps too much on being Srs with my art. Starting again tonight, ten minutes every day.

I should also get back to a story or two that I was briefly working on. And the dishes. Nadja‘s sleeping, though, so I shouldn’t do the latter right now. Our bedroom and kitchen are only separated by a curtain.

We have been having preposterous amounts of fun lately, including the great success that was the Kung Fu and Kasseroles Party. Great friends, and casseroles and covered dishes were consumed in large quantities.

Here are trailers for the movies that ran all night:

Living Room TV:

The Magnificent Butcher  (Sammo Hung at his best), The Tai Chi Master  (A 90s Wire-Fu classic), 36th Chamber of Shaolin (Because Gordon Liu).

Laptop in Library:

Duel of the Tough twice (good fights, a film by Godfrey Ho) and The Holy Flame of the Martial World  (a truly WUT film in so many ways).

Netbook Opposite the Toilet:

The Fearless Hyena on repeat (a personal favorite, my first Chan kung fu film).

Anyroad, welcome to the SECOND most bizarre part of The Wizard’s Lesson:

Need a RECAP?
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4

As always, click to embiggen:

Chinese Hells 1 Chinese Hells 2
See, that wasn’t so bad, was it?

Love,

benjamin “greater-than-zero chance of current intoxication” sTone

* Apparently this word bugs some people. They can go screw.
** This comic leaves copyright on December 2, 2024

Originally published at benchiladaland. You can comment here or there.

Yeah, I’m a few days behind. I’ve been busy.

I’ve been having far too much fun already with my Artisan Ponies project on Tumblr. If you’ve been following my art for long, you know that animals are NOT my forte, but that somehow my horses always look…unique.

Artisan Pony 6 munching

tumblr_nf918qGcZ91u3lep9o1_1280
I’m starting the next Wizard’s Lesson tonight–a two page splash–and I’ll do my damnedest to have it up for Tuesday. For now, we have:

The Wizard’s Lesson Part One
Next Pages
The Next Page
The Lastest So Far

First VERY preliminary sketches for the Tarot deck I’m going to do have started. Don’t worry, I won’t be crossing any streams, and will finish The Wizard’s Lesson before continuing.

Tarot trump notes
In other news, Nadja and I are working next week on our online sales model. We should have it up soon and you can buy terribly fun things from us.

For now, peace out motherfuckers.

Love,

benjamin

REMINDER: The pony and tarot sketches leave copyright November 20, 2014.

Originally published at benchiladaland. You can comment here or there.

 
 
“Interesting” fact: unless I’m working on a piece that’s 100% planned-out and ready, I don’t keep track of which color I use on various parts of drawings.

As such, when I have something like The Wizard’s Lesson, colors on everything change unless I can remember from the last time I drew.

For example, I know that King Yama, Lord of the Underworld, should have a face red with righteous fury, so I draw it like that…then forgot which pencil I used. Glad I don’t have to draw him again. :P

I think that the color of Tzu Ch’un’s astral self is “green bice,” but don’t quote me on that, because that would be a stupid thing to quote me about.

Why would you even do that? Quote me on a color?

I thought I knew you.

Oh, by the way, our “Fuck Civility” buttons are now up on our Etsy shop. Support Steven Salaita, kids, by expressing your own first-amendment rights:

Fuck Civility Thumbnail

In any event, please have some looks back and today’s art:

The Wizard’s Lesson First Part
The Wizard’s Lesson Gore Begins
The Wizard’s Lesson Gore Continues

Wizard's Lesson The Pit

 

Love,

benjamin

Originally published at benchiladaland. You can comment here or there.

 
 
If last week’s part of The Wizard’s Lesson by P’u Sung Ling didn’t have enough violence or blood for you, then please accept this next helping:

The Wizard's Lesson - Impulsive behavior b
Next week we begin our visit of hell, kids!

I like drawing.

Love,

benjamin

Originally published at benchiladaland. You can comment here or there.

 
 
Are you wondering what all of this ‘benjamin being attacked by letters’ was all about?

I doubt it, but if you look below you’ll find that the last page pulls a Clarissa and explains it all:

Things I Can't Draw falling apart


 

 

Things I Can't Draw Things Fall Apart


Things I Can't Fall Apart


Things I Can't Draw Everything Ends


This Is How I Draw original

 

On January 30, 2005, I first used the term “Things I Can’t Draw” on LiveJournal, regarding The Day I Saw An Unidenfitied Flying Object, a story for some class that I drew when I was in about 2nd or 3rd grade.

On January 2, 2006, I did my first entire page of TICD, because I was bored near a pen and a sheet of printer paper. I had so much fun, and that coffee-maker still looks good…but wtf laptop?

Now, in October 2014, it’s time to retire the title.

Thing I Can’t Draw belong to the ages.

Welcome to This Is How I Draw.

Sure, it’s taken eight years for me to accept it completely, but I can draw; I simply have a very unique style. It takes me far longer than you would think—I can draw, but it’s difficult—and that’s totally fine, because I love the fuck out of doing it. I’ve been getting better as time goes on, and can easily finish things in one night that used to take me two or three.

The Wizard’s Lesson is a great example of this, and I have a page already uploaded and ready to post on Thursday. I start another tonight and may even have it ready for the same post.

The moral of the story is that you can all stop telling me that I really can draw, because I’ve finally acknowledged it. The next person who derides my derision can go screw. :P

Now, if you’ll excuse me, these bastards aren’t going to fold themselves:

Sheep Folding Practice by JFH Thomas bookcover

Love,

benjamin sTone

REMINDER: The works pictured above leave copyright on October 14, 2024.

Originally published at benchiladaland. You can comment here or there.

Hey kids!

As some of you may know, my brain doesn’t always get words right. It’s always been a problem with my gray matter, but the older I get, the more my brain misfires and makes me sound like I’m having a stroke.

I don’t always keep track of them, but I’m starting to, and I’m going to start drawing as many of them as I can. The first one was a misfire while talking to Nadja about a recipe I was going to make with a number of onions, which aren’t Nadja’s stomach’s favorite if they’re not very cooked. I was asking about a change I could make.

Please enjoy my first I Don’t Words Talk Right:

Crystalize the onions Fuckbrain Comix

Doing a completed drawing every few days isn’t exactly #Inktober, but #Drawtober works just fine with me.

Tomorrow you might have the horrifyingly blood-soaked very strange next bit of The Wizard’s Lesson as well as a bit about the best new horror movie I’ve seen in ages.

Love,

benjamin
Who’d crystallize YOUR onions any day….

Originally published at benchiladaland. You can comment here or there.

Hey kids!

As some of you may know, my brain doesn’t always get words right. It’s always been a problem with my gray matter, but the older I get, the more my brain misfires and makes me sound like I’m having a stroke.

I don’t always keep track of them, but I’m starting to, and I’m going to start drawing as many of them as I can. The first one was a misfire while talking to Nadja about a recipe I was going to make with a number of onions, which aren’t Nadja’s stomach’s favorite if they’re not very cooked. I was asking about a change I could make.

Please enjoy my first I Don’t Words Talk Right:

Crystalize the onions Fuckbrain Comix

Doing a completed drawing every few days isn’t exactly #Inktober, but #Drawtober works just fine with me.

Tomorrow you might have the next chapter of The Wizard’s Lesson, as well as a bit about the best new horror movie I’ve seen in ages.

Love,

benjamin
Who’d crystallize your onions ANY day….

Originally published at benchiladaland. You can comment here or there.

 

I don’t even understand.

I mean, attacking me with one letter wasn’t enough, I had to have another chucked at me? I was even told to stand under the G because it’s not as sharp!

Hrm.

Things I Can't Draw Things Fall Apart

Originally published at benchiladaland. You can comment here or there.

 
 
Things I Can't Draw falling apart

What the hell just happened?

benjamin
Searching for meaning

Originally published at benchiladaland. You can comment here or there.

 
FACTS:

We will be at Made-Fest next weekend, both Saturday the 27th and Sunday the 28th. There’s a FB page here.

We’ll be on the east side of the vendor area, up against the wall of the Highdive.

We’ll be sharing our booth with artist Sophie McMahon, who is awesome.

You will come buy our things.

There will be a mini-comic with this as its cover:

Benchilada Comix 1 cover

For more awesome things to do in Champaign-Urbana all the time, visit my Ladybee von Robot‘s AWESOME local events webpage, Nothing to Do in C-U. If you know of a local event that’s coming up, let us know!

Love,

benjamin

Originally published at benchiladaland. You can comment here or there.

FACTS:

We will be at Made-Fest next weekend, both Saturday the 20th and Sunday the 21st. There’s a FB page here.

We’ll be on the east side of the vendor area, up against the wall of the Highdive.

We’ll be sharing our booth with artist Sophie McMahon, who is awesome.

You will come buy our things.

There will be a mini-comic with this as its cover:

Benchilada Comix 1 cover

For more awesome things to do in Champaign-Urbana all the time, visit my Ladybee von Robot‘s AWESOME local events webpage, Nothing to Do in C-U, with a frontpage update tomorrow.

Love,

benjamin

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